Certainly don’t mean to be trite with the post title, but I’m trying to look at this situation in the most positive and productive way that I can at this point. These are tremendously dark times for me. Perhaps Alexander Graham Bell stated it more eloquently:
“When one door closes another door opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one that has opened for us.”
Regrettably, the most important relationship I’ve had for the last 17+ years is over. Once a tremendously inspiring, supportive, and nurturing association, the situation has deteriorated into a shell of its former self, like the skin of a molted snake.
Michele & I sent an email message to friends and family “announcing” the end of our relationship. Seemed like a horribly impersonal way to do it. Like choosing divorce for the two of us, the email announcement was the least bad option. It was a balance of wanting to let a lot of people know jointly, and quickly, and to have them “hear” it from us. Phone calls to everyone was just not practical.
Here are a few significant excerpts:
It is with tremendous sadness that we send this message to let you know that we have decided to end our marriage. We’re sorry to have to tell you this in an email, but we wanted to make sure you heard it directly from us.
While this may come as a surprise and maybe even a shock to many, things have been deteriorating for quite some time. We have worked earnestly through counseling for much of the past year. As of late, it became apparent that divorce was the the least worst option for us. We mutually decided to begin the process last week.
We understand that this news may be difficult for some of you. Please know that while things have changed for us, that last thing we want to do is put anyone in an uncomfortable situation or demand anyone “choose sides”. In situations where you would have normally invited us both, please continue to do so. We don’t expect there to be any issues between the two of us. If there are concerns, the two of us will work them out. For the time being, we will both remain living at our current residence.
We have been incredibly fortunate to have had the time together for the last 17+ years. We have been through much together and been able to accomplish many things with the support of each other. For that we are extremely grateful. We deeply appreciate the love and support from our friends and family, before, during, and after this challenging process.
Respectfully,
Dean and Michele